Your First Swim: The Lane, the Changing Room, and the Bit Everyone Dreads
Lane swimming etiquette for beginners: how to pick a lane, how to join it, how to let someone past, and how to get from the changing room to the water.
Leave the Sofa
Getting off the sofa when you have not moved in a while: what the first step costs, what actually happens in a first session, how to go alone, and how to come back after missing one.
The Gym Floor: Etiquette Nobody Tells You, in the Order You'll Need It
Gym etiquette for beginners, in the order you meet it: the machine you want is taken, the wipe-down, putting things back, and what counts as staring.
How to Leave a Session Early Without It Being a Defeat
How long should a first gym session be? Twenty to thirty minutes — and nine still counts. How to leave a machine, a class or a pool early, and why that is fine.
Where to Stand in a Beginner Class, and What the First Ten Minutes Contain
What to expect in your first fitness class: when to arrive, where to stand, what the first ten minutes contain, and how to scale a move down unnoticed.
Your First Session, Minute by Minute: What Actually Happens
What to expect on your first day at the gym, in order: the desk, the changing room, the forty seconds of standing still, the session, and how you leave.
The Gear You Do Not Need, and the Two Things You Do
What do I need to start going to the gym? Two things, and you probably own both. The kit list that is required, and what the rest is for.
Pay-As-You-Go Against a Membership: The Break-Even Session Count
Pay as you go gym vs membership: one division gives you the break-even session count. The sum, its limits, and a decision table.
Getting Out of a Membership: What the Cancellation Clause Requires
How to cancel a gym membership: the four facts to get from the contract first, the sequence in order, and a script you can send in a form that is hard to lose.
Joining Fee, Minimum Term, Notice Period: What Each One Does
Gym joining fee and minimum term explained, with the notice period beside them: what each one is for, and the sum that combines all three.
The Clauses to Read Before You Sign a Gym Contract
A gym membership contract: what to look for, clause by clause. The four that decide the money, and the three that decide how you leave.
What Starting Actually Costs: The Annual Total Nobody Shows You
How much does a gym membership cost a year? Not twelve times the monthly. The six-line arithmetic, and the cost per session you actually attend.
The Version You Can Do Without Buying Anything
A first month with no equipment and no gym: what you already own, four weeks of sessions built from time rather than kit, and the two things to buy later.